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MODERN
DAY LOVE LETTER
Dearest
Girl:
I am very happy to inform you that I have fallen in love with
you since Tuesday, the 17th of August 1999. With Reference
to the meeting held between us on the 17th of August 1999
at 1500 hours, I would like to present myself as a Prospective
Lover. Our love affair would be on probation for A Period
of three months And depending on compatibility, would be Made
permanent. Of course, upon completion of probation, there
will be continuous on-the-relationship training and relationship
appraisal schemes leading up to promotion from lover to spouse.
The expenses incurred for coffee and entertainment would initially
be shared equally between us. Later, based on your performance,
I might take up a larger share of the expenses. However I
am broad-minded enough, to be taken care of, on your expense
account I request you to kindly respond within 30 days of
receiving this letter, failing which, this offer would be
canceled without further Notice and I shall be considering
someone else. I would be happy, if you could forward this
letter to your sister, if you do not wish to take up this
offer. Thanking you in anticipation.
Yours sincerely, [Boy]
Dear Boy:
Please refer to your letter dated today. I am pleased to inform
you that hope to accept your proposal for romance. However,
you should be informed that there are certain conditions of
acceptance. Promotional prospects are to my satisfaction. However,
please enlighten me as to your retirement benefits. Gratuity
should be generous. I also need to be assured that there is
sufficient security with regards to this commitment. If there
is any chance at all of retrenchment or consequent disinterest
on your part, then I should receive monetary compensation
according to union standards. Due to the nature of my position,
I am sure you will agree that an expense account should be
arranged for my access in light of the 'VIP'. I shall be entertaining.
In addition, housing and transport allowances should be in
order and nothing less than a luxury condo and a Jag are in
order. Please also note that there should be no moonlighting
restrictions placed on myself. If you are still interested
in the relationship, please reply on an urgent basis as other
prospective lovers have sent indications of interest. Please
also note that my sister is happily employed.
Yours perhaps, [Girl]
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